Trust Yourself If You Want a Better Romantic Relationship

September 2, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments
Trust is a word that makes us feel good, especially n a relationship.
 
GenuLines turns the idea inward for a look at relationships and self-trust.
 
call to action for trust
 
 

Trust Yourself If You Want a Better Romantic Relationship

One of the keys to a stable romantic relationship is self-trust.
 
Couple lacking trustWithout it your partner can lose confidence in you over time. You’ll have problems making decisions.
 
And there may be a few sexual problems, too.
 
Romantic relationships have a foundation of trust. You may have it for your partner but not yourself.
 
 
 
 
 
Let’s say you put yourself down in front of your partner. They may go along with you in the beginning, but that behavior will get old over time.
 
Contrast this behavior with trusting yourself.
 
You’ll be more confident. And your partner will pick up on this.
 
You’ll have both your emotional and physical needs met. That’s sure to spice up your relationship.
 
Sharing
If you don’t trust yourself, it’s not likely you’ll share your feelings with your partner. Communication is another relationship building block.
 
Without it you could by headed for a break-up.
 
Trust issues can affect your attitude. You’ll send out negative energy toward those around you, including your partner.
 
Would you want to hang around someone who’s negative?
 
It’s very likely you won’t. Over time, you’ll look for ways to avoid that person.
 
Make sure that person isn’t you.
 
Sharing negative feelings with your partner is different from being negative. It’s pretty much impossible to be positive 100% of the time.
 
Aim for striking a balance and working towards being more positive than negative. That can’t happen if you doubt yourself.
 
A bit of effort and a healthy dose of self-trust gives your relationship a better chance to work.
 
Your partner will be happier and so will you. You have a choice.
 
Stay closed and lack trust in yourself. Or open up and gain the confidence to have the best possible relationship.
 
JohnK 9-3-2019
 
stick figure hearing about trustOverheard: “Tension is who you think you should be, relaxation is who you are”
 
                                          ~Chinese proverb
 
 
 
 
 
disclaimer concerning trust

How to Use Failure to Strengthen Belief in Yourself

August 27, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments
                                                                                                          airplane landing in trees is a failure                                      Does the thought of failure fill you with dread? You’re not alone. 
 
Read on as GenuLines looks at some ideas to help you believe in yourself and to loosen failure’s grip.
 
 
 
 
 
 
call to action for avoiding failure

How to Use Failure to Strengthen Belief in Yourself

One of the best tools for dealing with failure is failure itself. You can examine it to figure out what went wrong.
 
You can look back on the steps you took and try to find the exact point of failure. Then you’ll be able to choose alternative steps based on this information.
 
You do need to be honest in your assessment of why the failure happened.
 
If you blame others for your failures, you’ll mask the causes, and you’ll never move on. It’s easier to blame others rather than admit mistakes.
 
But you aren’t doing yourself any favors when you do this.
 
Recognizing your failure is important, but don’t be hypercritical. Putting yourself down because you failed won’t help your cause.
 
Know that failure happens and embrace it. Then, you can take a step back and figure out your next move.

Learning from others

boy reading abut failureYou can get inspiration from the failure of others. People write about their trials and tribulations in books.
 
They record videos about their setbacks. Their experiences can help you by giving you tips on how to avoid the mistakes they made.
 
 
 
 
Using this approach can help you turn things around at a much faster rate. If you’re not doing this yet, give it some thought.
 
Drawing from the experiences of others also shows you that you aren’t alone. Many of the most successful people overcame obstacles.
 
Their stories can help you feel better about your own slip-ups.
 
In other words, if they did it, so can you. That too is a powerful benefit of using failure to your advantage.
 
If you’re repeating the same mistakes over and over, it’s time to take a hard look at what you’re doing. If you’re struggling to break that cycle, you may want to find a coach who can help you.
 
Sometimes, that extra push can be all that you need to get you to break out of the pattern.
 
JohnK 8-27-2019
 
stick figure wanting to avoid failureOverheard: “Failure is success if we learn from it” 
                                ~Malcolm Forbes
 
 
 
 
 
Photo #1 by David Kovalenko on Unsplash
Photo #2 by Woodsy on RGBstockcom 
 
 
 
 
disclaimer concerning failure
 
 
 
                                          

Use Social Media To Show Your Appreciation

August 20, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments
Do you ever think of social media as a vehicle for showing appreciation?
 
GenuLines asks you to consider your social media use as a means of appreciation. 
 
 
 
call to action for appreciation
 

Use Social Media to Show Your Appreciation

Is there anyplace social media isn’t? It’s everywhere, with people willing to share all aspects of their lives.
 
From cute cat pictures to complete details of what they had for breakfast.
 
Granted, not everyone appreciates these constant updates. But with smart management, social media can be a great way to give the world a look at the things you appreciate.
 
Let’s start with Pinterest. If you’ve never used it before start setting up boards about your favorite items. These could be podcasts that better the human condition. Or, if if you have healthy recipes you’ve tried and liked, create a board for that.
 
You can even structure your boards as group boards. Then you can invite others to post on your boards.
 
You’ll learn about things others enjoy. And you have control over who joins so you can keep spammers from infiltrating your boards.
 
If you insist on posting details of every meal on social media, consider using Twitter to do this. It’s a more forgiving platform since the messages pass through quicker.
 
And they only contain a small number of characters.
 
As for Facebook, your friends there might not be as receptive. Now you know.
Make it legal

thumbs up for social mediaIt’s great to show your appreciation for the small things using social media. But make sure you have the rights to post what you post.

People and companies take copyright infringement seriously. And posting any picture on a whim can get you into serious trouble.
 
 
 
The fines can be hefty. And there have been instances of criminal actions taken against perpetrators.
 
If you search on Google for images and you don’t know whether it’s okay to use them, likely it’s not. Don’t take this issue lightly.
 
You also want to make sure you have permission to post pictures of people. If they’re people you know, you can ask them through a verbal confirmation.
 
If you want to post people you don’t know, make sure you get a signed release showing that it’s okay to use their image.
 
Needless to say, never use people’s images in a negative light. Be respectful with your social media posting.
 
Some channels may allow you to post inappropriate material, such as nude pictures, etc. Not the best idea.
 
Would you show it to your mother? If not, your best bet is to keep it off of social media.
 
JohnK 8-20-2019
 
stick man on social mediaOverheard: “Appreciation is a wonderful thing; it makes what is excellent in others belong to us as well.”
                                                ~Voltaire
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
disclaimer concerning social media appreciation

Support Groups: Can They Make a Difference?

August 13, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments
Is a support group right for you? GenuLines looks at some of the factors to consider if you’re leaning in that direction. 
 
call to action for support groups
 

Support Groups: Can They Make a Difference?

When you’re dealing with an adverse situation, you may feel like you’re all alone. It seems the bigger the problems, the more alone you feel.
 
help from support groupsBut others have dealt with the same or similar situation themselves. And, they can help you get through it and give you any needed support.
 
It’s best to face this head-on. Don’t try to put off dealing with it, thinking that it will get better by itself.
 
 
Some situations will get better by letting it go, but most won’t.
 
You should confront the challenge so that it doesn’t build up. You can also make a situation worse than it already is by not taking appropriate actions.
 
Talk to family members and friends. You may be surprised by their understanding.
 
And you’ll find some of them may have been in the same situation.
 
room for support groupsIf this falls short, a support group could offer help. The group members may want to meet with you in person to find out more about your circumstances. and how they can help.
 
Again, don’t put this off because your emotions will build.
 
 
Make an appointment as soon as possible. When you find a group that is related to your situation, go to meetings regularly.
 
It can be either the process or the meetings that help you overcome adversity. Or both.
 
The groups you find have gone through the process (and may still be going through it). If you try to rush the process, you may not get everything you need from the group.
 
Many groups offer their help free of charge. However, you should consider pitching in some money as there are costs involved with running these groups.
 
The groups may ask you to contribute some money to help out. Often, this is voluntary.
 
But, if the group is worthwhile, you want it to continue as a going concern. They need money for that to happen.
 
You get out of the group what you put into it, just like anything in life. If you go there and don’t get involved, you shouldn’t expect to get much help from the group.
 
Become involved and ask a lot of questions.
 
JK 8-13-2019
chiforyourself.com home
 
stick man hearing of support groupsOverheard: “It is a kingly act to assist the fallen”                                       ~Ovid 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
disclaimer concerning support groups

Computer Code Uses Routine – And It Works

August 6, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments

Having a routine can help your life go a lot smoother. GenuLines borrows from computer science to give you a template for setting up your own routine.

call to action for routine

Computer Code Uses Routine – And It Works

Ever write computer code? It’s an effective way of creating routines. These snippets of code can repeat the running of certain functions or processes.
 
They prevent coders from having to write redundant code each time they need it. It’s an efficient way to code and saves countless hours for programmers.
 
binary code shows routine
 
From the machine’s perspective, it will run successfully every time you call it. This assumes the code is well-written and bug-free.
 
With the program loaded the device runs the routines on command.
 
Humans try to create routines for themselves. They write down processes that they handle on a frequent basis.
 
For instance, you might pay your bills on the same day every month.
 
You have a system for how you do it. You follow a step-by-step procedure to organize the eventual payment of bills.
 
The routines that you set up for yourself help you to keep an orderly flow to the work at hand. But unlike a machine, you are subject to error.
 
That’s part of the human equation.
 
You can’t help it, and this means that your routines are fallible. While it may be annoying, it’s reasonable because you’re human.
 
Sometimes, we try to use machines to automate as much of our routine as we can.
Routine and Your BIlls
Let’s take a closer look at bill paying. Rather than send checks you can automate your bank payments on a specified date.
 
In most cases, all goes well and your bills get paid on time. But, what if you forgot to deposit enough funds into your account?
 
Your automatic payment will fail.
 
This issue shouldn’t discourage you from automating your life. You need to realize that there is room for error.
 
Be ready when errors occur.
 
While the banking example is trivial, others may not. For instance, suppose someone in your company is leaving. and they transfer an automated process over to your control.
 
The process works well for a while, and then one day, it blows up on you.
 
Your company is depending on you to get the work done. You never learned the manual completion of the automated process.
 
And you don’t know anything about coding.
 
As you can see, routines are great. But they have their limitations.
 
Be aware of those limitations and make sure you have steps in place should your plan not work for you.
 
JohnK 8-6-2019
 
stick man hearing of routineOverheard:  “Zen is not some kind of excitement, but concentration on our usual everyday routine”
                          ~Shunryu Suzuki
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
disclaimer concerning routine

Today’s Chi For Yourself Guest (Cancellation)

August 1, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments

 

Our Chi For Yourself guestApologies for not being able to bring you today’s scheduled interview. Lama Palden Drolma had to cancel, but we’re going to work to re-schedule her at a future date. 

Thank you!

 

 

JohnK  8-1-2019

Today’s Chi For Yourself Guest

August 1, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments

Apologies for not being able to bring this interview to you today. Lama Palden Drolma had to cancel, but we’re going to work to re-schedule her at a future date. 

Thank you!

 

Our Chi For Yourself guestOur guest today on Chi For Yourself brings a message that’s sorely needed in these turbulent times. Lama Palden Drolma is a licensed psychotherapist, spiritual teacher, and coach.

She’s also one of the first Western lamas. 

Lama Palden Drolma is the author of Love on Every Breath: Tonglen Meditation for Transforming Pain into Joy.

 

JohnK 8-1-2019

 

 

Be Confident: Gain Self-Trust With The Help of Others

July 30, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments
Confident people can give off great energy. If you find yourself wishing you could, too, then I’m confident this GenuLines offering is for you.
 
call to action for being confident

Be Confident: Gain Self-Trust With The Help of Others

A confident tigerDid you ever watch people you considered confident? They know what to do in almost every situation.
 
Even when they don’t, they know how to find answers.
 
They don’t let problems get in their way. They know how to talk to people.
 
Their confidence is their power.
 
 
 

 

Image by GraphicMama-team from Pixabay

 

 
It’s likely these confident people trust themselves. It’s impossible to have confidence when you don’t trust yourself.
 
The confidence comes from an internal trust. It makes sense when you think about it.
 
If you don’t know too many people who are confident, try to learn about successful people. One great way to do this is to check out TED Talks.
 
(If you’re not familiar with these, TED stands for Technology, Entertainment, and Design.)
 
It’s an organization that exists to spread ideas, usually in video form. You can find many of these talks through a TED Talks search on YouTube.com.
 
Short and sweet
Many of these videos are short but with high impact. It’s unlikely you’ll find speakers that don’t have confidence.
 
You can observe the speakers in the video and see how they speak.
 
Also, observe their body language. Do they smile a lot? How do they engage with the audience?
 
Another source of inspiration is Amazon books. Read biographies of successful people.
 
Finding confidence stories among biographies can be tough at times. That’s because the stories may not center on confidence.
 
But, it usually resonates through the story.
 
If nothing else, you’ll pick up on some inspiration from other areas in addition to confidence.
 
Find a mentor
You’ll know when someone is right for you because you’ll both form a good badge for confident mentorrelationship from the start. Mentors are people who trust themselves and have confidence.
 
Otherwise, it’s unlikely you would pick those people to be your mentor.
                                                                                         
 
 
Image by Tumisu from Pixabay
 
 
You can establish a formal mentor relationship. Or you can just keep in contact with someone you respect.
 
You’ll absorb some positive attributes just by being in this relationship.
 
But, it doesn’t hurt to observe how your mentor interacts with others and how they solve problems. When you observe or reach out to confident people, it will help you become more confident.
 
You can see what you are doing wrong and make changes. When you become confident, lack of trust in yourself will be a thing of the past.
 
JohnK 7-30-2019
 
stick man being confidentOverheard: “The way to develop self-confidence is to do the thing you fear and get a record of successful experiences behind you.”
 
                                 ~William Jennings Bryan
 
 
 
 
 
disclaimer to highlight being confident
 

Can Vision Boards Help You Believe in Yourself?

July 23, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments
It’s called a vision board. Its purpose is to reinforce some message about yourself or your goals.
 
But, does it really work?
 
Today GenuLines looks at the question from both sides.
 
banner for vision boards
 

Can Vision Boards Help You Believe in Yourself?

man looking for vision boardsWhile “vision board” is not an official definition, it should serve to give you the concept in a nutshell. Are vision boards an effective tool towards helping your self-development?
 
First, we look at how they work. In general, you place information and pictures on your vision board.
 
 
 

Image by Peggy und Marco Lachmann-Anke from Pixabay

 

These represent various aspects of your life. They can be personal, professional, or both.
 
You could have separate vision boards for personal and professional purposes as well.
 
Vision board pros and cons
One of the most significant benefits of a vision board is you can refer to it whenever you need inspiration. Or if an aspect of your life changes in some way.
 
You can update the board to reflect those changes.
 
Another pro (but possibly also a con) is that you can put whatever you want on a vision board. That’s great, but if it doesn’t help you with your goals, it may not be as beneficial to have it on the board.
 
In fact, it could hinder your progress since it takes up prime real estate on your board.
 
Remember that nothing is set in stone on your board. If you find something on it that isn’t working, take it down.
Vision boards are not for everyone
Some people find them to be a waste of time. They spend lots of time finding items to place on the boards and then never refer to them again.
 
It’s time that could be better spent elsewhere.
 
One use of vision boards is to place accomplishments on them. It’s easy to forget about events that happened earlier in our lives.
 
Keeping spots on the vision board dedicated to them will serve as reminders.
 
Don’t believe that you’ve forgotten about your accomplishments? Think back to what you accomplished in high school and college.
 
Or when you started your first job.
 
Having a handy reminder of your accomplishments boosts your self-belief. Each accomplishment will help you remember what you went through to get it.
 
This can help move you toward future accomplishments.
 
There are no right or wrong answers when creating a vision board. It just needs to work for you.
 
If it doesn’t, you should figure out why and adjust as you see fit.
 
signature for vision board article
 
 
 
JohnK 7-23-2019
chiforyourself.com home
 
 
stick man sees vision boardsOverheard: “Cherish your visions and your dreams, as they are the children of your soul, the blueprints of your ultimate achievements”
                                         ~Napoleon Hill
 
 
 
 
 
 
disclaimer to highlight vision boards
 
 
 
 

Appreciate the Small Things And Find Contentment

July 16, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments
You’re intent on finding happiness, but what about contentment? You hear about appreciating the small stuff and feeling happy.
 
Today GenuLines asks you to turn your aim from happiness to contentment.
 
call to action for contentment

Appreciate the Small Things And Find Contentment

baby feeling contentmentMost emotions are transitional, meaning you’re never in one state for long periods. People labeled upbeat actually do have moments of sadness or depression.
 
And even depressed people may not feel depressed all the time.
 
 
 
 
 
Think about a major event such as a war. When two countries are fighting, both sides lose lives.
 
It’s bloody, and it can last for several years. But, when the war is over, the countries are euphoric.
 
There will be no more bloodshed because of the war, and people can return to their lives.
 
But nothing that has changed in the world except that the war has ended. In other words, the sun still sets each day.
 
People still have to manage their lives.
 
The euphoria from the war ending doesn’t last long. Months later, the war is still over, but the euphoria has died down.
 
The same is true in a smaller way when you’re ill. For instance, suppose you have a stomach bug that leaves you uncomfortable and in pain.
 
When the bug passes you feel wonderful.
 
Yet, you don’t feel any better than you did when you weren’t experiencing the bug. It’s relative to the bad feelings.
 
That’s how emotional states work. They go from one to the other on a constant basis.
 
Appreciating the small things in life may lead to happiness. But, it’s likely you’re content more than you are happy.
 
Contentment can feel like a neutral state, leaning on the side of happy. There isn’t anything wrong when you’re content.
 
But, there’s also nothing ratcheting up your happiness.
 
Consider contentment before happiness
Striving for happiness can be stressful. The antidote? Gratitude. You’ll feel content without having to always push toward happiness.
 
Time spent in contentment means you’re doing something right.
 
Think about the people you love. And think about all you have, such as your health and a good job.
 
Imagine life without them and you’ll really appreciate contentment. That thought may even make you happy, if only for a short time.
 
JohnK 7-16-2019
 
stick figure feeling contentmentOverheard: “A harvest of peace is produced from a seed of contentment”
                            ~Proverb
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
disclaimer to deal with contentment
 
 
 
« Older Entries Recent Entries »