Can A Mentor Be A Positive Force In Your Life?

November 5, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments

Is it worth it to work with a mentor or life coach? There are differing opinions. Today

GenuLines looks at some considerations if you choose to go in this direction. 

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Can A Mentor Be A Positive Force In Your Life?

You’re going to get beaten down at certain points in your life. The negativity and competitiveness you encounter can be brutal.
 
If nothing seems to be working for you, it may be time for a mentor.
 
mentor giving adviceMentors view your life from an outsider’s perspective. They can suggest changes to make while encouraging you for what you’re doing right.
 
A good mentor can (and should) be sensitive to how he or she presents your critique. They can also give you the encouragement that helps restore your self-belief.
 
The intention is to reignite the spark that has been missing in your life. When you get that back, there’ll be no stopping you.
 
 
Choosing your mentor
You want to be selective in choosing your potential candidates. Ask good questions.
 
Get critiques from anyone who’s used the mentors you are considering. Get the terms of the agreement in writing.
 
And make sure you include accountability on the part of the mentor you choose. 
 
Of course, you need to be accountable to the mentor, as well. It’s great to have a mentor give you advice.
 
But, if you don’t take it, you’re wasting your time and money.
 
Be aware that the help he or she provides is likely to put you outside your comfort zone. You’ll be doing tasks that you never imagined you would.
 
You’ll find this both scary and exciting. And your results may surprise you.

If it doesn’t work

Then again you may not get the results the mentor suggested you would. This is where holding them accountable comes into play.
 
If you’re meeting your end of the deal, you should be critical when you aren’t making progress. Your agreement should come with milestones, and you deliver payment based on them.
 
If you pay everything up front, you lose the accountability factor. A good mentor would be willing to accept payment based on milestones.
 
They know they can deliver.
 
You can use a mentor for more than guiding your career. It can be for personal reasons as well.
 
Life coaching is a growing field, though some question its effectiveness. 
 
The call is yours. 
 
JohnK 11-5-2019
 
 
stick figure talking about mentorsOverheard: “My mentor said, ‘Let’s go do it,’ not ‘You go do it.’ How powerful when someone says, ‘Let’s!’”
                                    ~ Jim Rohn 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Photo by NeONBRAND on Unsplash
 
 

 

 
 
 
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Next Chi For Yourself: When Antidepressants Aren’t Enough

October 31, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments

 

Our guest on the next Chi For Yourself is Dr. Stuart Eisendrath, author of WHEN ANTIDEPRESSANTS AREN’T ENOUGH: Harnessing The Power of Mindfulness to Alleviate Depression.

You can listen in today as I record the show, but it won’t be available on the ChiForYourself.com Start Page. 

Instead, we’re going to use the Chi For Yourself Facebook Community page. Join us today at 1 pm Eastern, 10 am Pacific time at the Chi For Yourself Facebook Community page.

 

Possessions: Do They Have a Hold On Your Life?

October 29, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments
Collecting possessions is a part of life. It’s hard to deny.
 
Or, avoid for that matter.
 
GenuLines invites you to read on and to gauge the importance of your possessions.
 
 
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Possessions: Do They Have a Hold On Your Life?

You spend a good chunk of your time protecting your possessions. You worked hard for them, so you want to make sure no one takes them from you.
 
picture of possessionsThe problem is, you may be putting too much emphasis on them.
 
Consider that when you take your last breath those articles are no longer yours.
 
 
 
So you could say they never really belonged to you anyway.
 
You may be thinking of passing on your possessions to your offspring. But consider the cost of acquiring those material items.
 
And I’m not just talking about financial costs.
 
Ask yourself if you’re stepping on other peoples’ toes while chasing those things. Your relationships are much more important than your possessions.
 
Suppose you somehow lost some material item you valued.
 
Let’s say you misplaced it, or it was stolen. Most likely you can replace it.
 
Inconvenient? Yes. But it’s not the end of the world.
 
The death of a family member is something else again. Don’t take loved ones for granted.
 
The memories they give you are possessions of the priceless type.
 
There are other ways to lose those close to you. Your busy work schedule can alienate family members.
 
Your spouse may decide to move on. And your kids may grow to resent you.
 
Focusing on material possessions can affect your friendships, too. Many of these friendships took a long time to develop.
 
But, you can lose them in no time if you prioritize your possessions.
 
Your attitude about money calls for the same kind of mindfulness. But, you don’t want to make it your life’s purpose
 
You can always make money somehow.
 
Friendships? Not always the case.
 
If you find you’re too focused on obtaining money and possessions, take a step back. Think about what your family and friends mean to you.
 
You’ll find they’re priceless.
 
JohnK 10-29-2019
 
stick figure talking about possessionsOverheard:  “An object in possession seldom retains the same charms which it had when it was longed for”

                                            ~Pliny The Younger

 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Image by C.M. Zijderveld from Pixabay

 
 
 
 
 
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Adversity And Life Coaches: Should You Buy In?

October 22, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments
At certain times in your life, you find yourself weighed down by adversity. You wouldn’t mind having another “hand on the wheel.”
 
GenuLines looks at life coaches and whether one is right for you.
 
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Adversity And Life Coaches: Should You Buy In?

Good life coaches work to help you with various aspects of your life. They can show you the parts that are holding you back.
 
fighting adversityThey can also help you when you face adversity. And they can give you the guidance you need to help you pick up the pieces and get back on track.
 
They may start by teaching you to be positive. Techniques can include affirmations to retrain your brain to think positive thoughts.
 
 
 
That’s one of the biggest means to deal with adverse situations. Positivity won’t shield you from hard times, but it will help you focus on what’s important.
 
You need to practice these affirmations for them to be effective. It’s not a casual exercise that you do whenever the mood strikes.
 
Make it a daily habit. Your mentor will know if you’re not practicing them.
Prepare for the truth
The truth hurts, but it may be what you need to get through your situation. You’ll hear it when you get caught up in blaming others and not taking responsibility.
 
A good coach will present it in such a way that you’ll come to the conclusions yourself. And that makes it easier for you to accept and counter the action.
 
Don’t be quick to blame the life coach if things don’t work out (This assumes you chose a qualified coach)
 
It’s not difficult to find a good coach if you take the right steps. Check the internet.
 
Do a bit of digging to learn about each coach’s background. Coaches are going to encourage you to step outside your comfort zone.
 
Most coaches will use this to help clients break away from bad habits and form new ones.
 
It’s called a comfort zone for a reason. It will be awkward, and at times, you may get angry at their suggestions.
 
One thing to keep in mind. If your adversity was born out of trauma a life coach may not be a good idea.
 
If this is the case, seek out a qualified professional.
 
Your life coach is still an option for working with with other aspects of your development.
 
JohnK 10-22-2019
 
stick man working through adversityOverheard: “There is no education like adversity”
                                 ~Benjamin Disraeli
 
 
 
 
 
 

Image by mohamed Hassan from Pixabay

 
 
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Ready For Routine Time Management Software?

October 15, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments
If your 9-5 routine is getting the best of you it may be time to look at time management software. GenuLines puts forth some points to consider so you can get the upper hand.
 
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Ready For Routine Time Management Software?

Struggling to keep up with the demands of life? Maybe it’s time to consider a software program to organize your tasks.
 
The program can be as simple as alerting you when a certain task needs starting or when one is due. Most email packages will let you do this.
 
If your email doesn’t help, you can find free scheduling or calendar packages online. If all else fails, Google has a calendar package that you can use for this purpose.
 
To boost your productivity you may want a more robust solution. For this time management software might do the trick.
 
These programs track your activity down to the minute, and even to the second.
 
Many let you set up your tasks ahead of time. The time slots you block out will infer the amount of time you estimated for each task.
 
When you complete a task, you mark it as complete on the program.
And these time management programs feature reports. These will show you how well you did with your estimations for your tasks.
 
They will alert you when you did not complete the task in the time allotted. This information can help you refine your estimates for future schedules.
 
Some people freak out over sophisticated programs and figure they can’t use them. They feel the programs track at too granular a level.
 
They also feel that their company managers could use these programs against them. Employees feel pressured to get their work completed in the estimated time.
 
This is especially stressful if the managers are the ones setting the estimates.
 
Not just a routine decision
If you decide to use a time management program, you need to make sure you update it when you complete the tasks. This is something that could take a bit of time to get used to doing.
 
You also need to account for activities that pop up that you didn’t allow for and weren’t on your schedule. The better packages will be able to cope with those problems.
 
Check online for the term “time management” and use the results to see what’s available. Consider the price against your budget, and try to find software that allows you to try before you buy.
 
JohnK 10-15-2019
ChiForYourself.com home
 
stick figure talking about routineOverheard: “The disease which inflicts bureaucracy and what they usually die from is routine”
                                               ~ John Stuart Mill
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
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Your Children May Not Trust Themselves

October 8, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments
 
You say you don’t trust yourself? Did you know that the same feelings can filter down to your kids too?

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Your Children May Not Trust Themselves

Lack of self-trust is far from uncommon. It’s possible that you developed this tendency while you were growing up.
 
picture that promotes trustYou can pick it up as a kid and carry it into your adult life. You pass it on to your kids, and they do the same to theirs.
 
Your actions and exchanges may be subtle. Your kids will hear what you and your spouse talk about as well as discussions by, or with, other family members.
 
You may well do things that you’re not even aware of, but your kids will pick up on those, too.
 
 
 
It’s a difficult situation because you want your kids to be safe. But you don’t want to suggest that they give a pass to everyone without question.
 
A delicate balance
Trusting yourself requires trusting others. That’s where the difficulty can creep in.
 
You’ve likely been burned by a few people enough times to warrant your caution. But, these experiences can also resonate with your children.
 
Aim for a balance. You want them to trust certain people while remaining mindful through the process.
 
Of course, you want to teach your kids always to be trustworthy themselves, even if others don’t respond in kind.
 
Minus that, self-trust will be near impossible.
 
If they let others down, they won’t have any reason to develop an internal trust. So you and your partner will want to doublecheck your own trustworthiness.
 
You may be trustworthy toward kids but not to other people. That can send the wrong signals to kids if you tell them they should be trustworthy to others.
 
It will leave them confused and unsure of what to do. In the long run, they’ll be untrustworthy, and they won’t develop self-trust.
 
Be sure to talk to your kids to help them develop the balance between caution and trust. If they have questions, be open to answering them.
 
Try not to take offense if they say you’re sending mixed signals with regards to trust. Find a balance and your kids will likely find it too.
 
Your family will have the necessary means to trust each other and yourselves. It’s not easy, but it’s definitely worth the effort.
 
You just have to keep at it.
 
JohnK 1-8-2019
 
 
stick man learning to trustOverheard:  “Learning to trust is one of life’s most difficult tasks.”
                                          ~Isaac Watts
 
 
 
 
 
Picture of a book to trust in
 
 
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Believe In Yourself, Believe In Your Business

October 1, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments

When you believe in yourself, good things happen. GenuLines reminds you that the benefits extend to your business success. 

Read on to find out more.

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Believe In Yourself, Believe In Your Business

photo helps you believeSo you’ve started a new business, and you’re excited. No more working for someone else.
 
You’re on your own. You’re the boss.
 
Your spouse is excited knowing that you’re doing something you’ve wanted to do. Then, a few months pass, and you haven’t made a dime in your business.
 
 
 
Suddenly, you feel the stress of business ownership.
 
Suppliers are calling asking for their money. You’ve already sent a lot of of your savings into setting up your business.
 
Your spouse becomes less confident, and your friends are all telling you to throw in the towel.
 
They’re saying that you gave it your best shot, but it’s time to find a regular job.
Many would follow this advice and let the business fold.
 
But, people who make it in business stick it out for one reason – they believe in what they’re doing.
 
They know that in time the concept will work. They just need to stick it out.
 
It’s this resolve that allows them to succeed.
 
Of course, just putting in the time and doing busy work is not going to advance your business. You need to have a solid foundation at the start.
 
You could set up a roadmap or business plan. This will answer questions about how you will make your business work.
 
Treat this process as though you’re going to raise venture capital funds, even if you aren’t.
 
Try to put yourself in the position of a venture capital entrepreneur. Ask tough questions of yourself for your business.
 

Your Plan B

Consider making an alternate plan in case your main plan falls short of your goals. You might fail for any number of reasons and having a backup plan is a wise move to counter any problems.
 
Once your foundation is in place, you only need to take a leap of faith and believe that you can make it work.
 
You may face challenges. They’ll come from any and all directions- spouse, friends, family.
 
But you’ll have the conviction to see it through because you believe in yourself.
 
Now, there’s no guarantee that you’ll succeed. What’s guaranteed is that you won’t succeed if you give up too soon.
 
Often, success is right around the corner for those who have that conviction. And for those willing to continue despite all the challenges they face.
 
You can be one of the few who makes it if you choose to take this route.
 
JohnK 10-1-2019
ChiForYourself.com home
 
 
stick figure learning to believeOverheard: “You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.”
                                          ~A.A. Milne
 
 
Picture of a book to believe
 
 
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Appreciate Your Way To Lower Stress Levels

September 24, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments
Appreciate the small stuff and you’ll be less likely to get stressed out? It makes sense when you think about it.
 
GenuLines invites you to read on to get the details..
 
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Appreciate Your Way To Lower Stress Levels

 
angry face doesn't appreciateHigh-strung people can get upset about every little thing.
 
Their tendency to misread the “small stuff” causes them to blow up at every turn. Contrast this with people who appreciate the small things.
 
 
 
 
They aren’t going to let little situations bother them. In fact, it’s those little things that they learn to enjoy and embrace.
 
For instance, suppose there’s a problem at work with the shipment of an order. The high-strung individual is going to blow things out of proportion.
 
Their answer is to yell at everyone to get it fixed.
 
The appreciative person stays calm and figures out how to solve the problem. This makes it easier to work with people to right the situation.
 
And, they won’t see it all as a big deal. All the while being happy to have the job they have.
 
High-strung people or those who appreciate most everything? Easy choice, no?
 
I’m guessing you chose the appreciative person.
 
This person will also be able to handle major issues since he or she is at ease handling the minor ones. It’s true that appreciative people have lower stress levels than those who don’t.

But it doesn’t end there

Appreciative people still need good nutrition and at least a bit of exercise. No doubt these folks are already doing that because they love life and want to prolong it.
 
Appreciative people tend to be more adaptive, too.
 
If you’re a bit on the hot-headed side think about this. Be grateful for what you have and who you have.
 
When you take the time to be grateful, you’ll start to feel more relaxed. You’ll stop jumping to conclusions, and you’ll look for ways to solve problems in a relaxed manner.
 
You can also use exercise and relaxation techniques such as meditation and massage. Keep trying different ways to relax but above all, be appreciative of your entire life.
 
Your positive energy will attract others, and they’ll be more willing to follow your lead.
 
 
JohnK 9-24-2019
 
stick man learning to appreciateOverheard: “A grateful mind is a great mind which eventually attracts to itself great things.”
                                             ~Plato
 
 
 
 
Picture of a book to apppreciate
 
 
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Handle Adversity: Consider Opposing Viewpoints

September 17, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments
Adversity can bring you opportunity- an opportunity to do your homework! GenuLines helps you get an edge by looking at all sides of an issue.
 

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Handle Adversity: Consider Opposing Viewpoints

Adversity often grows out of misinformation about a situation. You know the information might not be true but you act on it as if it was.
 
A good way to counter this situation is to take the other end of an argument or the opposing viewpoint.
 
 
two men showing antagonismFirst, consider the people you have an issue with and learn more about them. Do you disagree with their political views?
 
Or do you have some other bias against them? For instance, religion can bring out different standpoints and beliefs.
 
 
 
 
For the sake of discussion, we’ll call your opposition adversaries. You’ll need to find out more about them.
 
The internet is a good place to start. If you get stuck go old school. Visit your local library and ask the reference librarian.
 
They specialize in research and they can help you.
 
Get A Read on Things
Read material that you normally would not. Do this even if you’re not facing an adversarial situation.
 
It gets you in the mindset of accepting differences in others. You can look for magazines and books, or you can view blogs and forums related to the topic you want to learn.
 
You aren’t required to agree with adversarial topics. You only want to learn more about them so that you have information on your side.
 
Back your arguments with information. This will make it tougher to challenge you because you can cite your sources.
 
Play devil’s advocate when approaching any subject. Try to pose questions that your adversaries would pose. See if you can understand why they would pose those questions.
 
It may get you to rethink your own beliefs.

What were they thinking?

It’s also important to understand the motivations of your adversaries. Here’s an example. Fundraisers sometimes use a lot of hype to get you to buy into their message.
 
When this happens, knowing the facts will help you make your decision.
 
Try to stay away from name-calling since this never solves the problem. You’ll come off as petty.
 
And you might strengthen your adversary’s position.
 
It’s okay to argue with people when you have the facts on your side. But, some people won’t accept those facts no matter how hard you try to get them to consider them.
 
When this happens, there isn’t much you can do but walk away.
 
JohnK 9-17-2017
 
 
stick figure hearing about adversityOverheard: “Little minds are tamed and subdued by misfortune, but great minds rise above them”
                                ~ Washington Irving
 
 
 
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Teaching Kids About Routine Through Chores

September 10, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments
Chances are you don’t think much about your daily routine. Your kids probably don’t think much about routine, either.
 
But in this article, GenuLines looks at teaching about routine while getting some things done around the house!
 
 
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Teaching Kids About Routine Through Choresdishwashing routine

Give kids their chores and you can expect to hear some moaning and groaning. Even if you tie the chores to an allowance.
 
They’ll be happy on payday, but not thrilled to know they have to work for the bucks.
 
 
 
 
 
But, giving your kids chores teaches them much more than work for pay. Often there are considerations that go with the chores.
 
For instance, they’ll have to check the oil before using the lawnmower. They’ll have to make sure the mower has enough gas.
 
And, of course, they’ve got to know how to start it.
 
If weed-whacking is part of the job they’ll need to learn that that comes first. Kids will also learn they have to do their chores on a regular basis. 
 
This routine instills in them the idea of a work ethic. Sticking with the mowing example, the kids will most likely have to do this once per week.

Easy does it

Even tasks that seem easy and don’t need a routine will have some sort of process. For instance, before kids load and run the dishwasher they’ll have to rinse some of the dishes.
 
They’ll have to load the machine in a way that none of the wash load breaks. Then, they load the soap dispenser and turn on the machine. 
 
It’s a process much like any other.
 
You may not have thought about this but video games can teach kids about how to use routines to their benefit. Many of the games go through sequences and steps for advancing to the next round.
 
Knowing these steps keeps the game fun and interesting. 
 
School sports for kids mean coaches and drills. These drills teach them the techniques needed to win games.
 
You can think of those as routines.
 
They’re meant to help the kids use the skills when they’re playing the game. The more they do the drills, the less they’ll need to think about what to do when they start playing.
 
The routines kids learn from their chores will carry through to their adult life. When they start their working life, they’ll be well versed in processes and routines.
 
JohnK 9-10-2019
chiforyourself.com home
 
 
stick man learning routineOverheard: “Routine, in an intelligent man, is a sign of ambition.”
                                   ~W. H. Auden
 
 
 
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