contentment

Tag Archive for contentment

How to Use Failure to Strengthen Belief in Yourself

August 27, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments

Does the thought of failure fill you with dread? You’re not alone.

Read on as GenuLines looks at some ideas to help you believe in yourself and to loosen failure’s grip.

How to Use Failure to Strengthen Belief in Yourself

One of the best tools for dealing with failure is failure itself. You can examine it to figure out what went wrong.

You can look back on the steps you took and try to find the exact point of failure. Then you’ll be able to choose alternative steps based on this information.

You do need to be honest in your assessment of why the failure happened.

If you blame others for your failures, you’ll mask the causes, and you’ll never move on. It’s easier to blame others rather than admit mistakes.

But you aren’t doing yourself any favors when you do this.

Recognizing your failure is important, but don’t be hypercritical. Putting yourself down because you failed won’t help your cause.

Know that failure happens and embrace it. Then, you can take a step back and figure out your next move.

Learning from others

You can get inspiration from the failure of others. People write about their trials and tribulations in books.

They record videos about their setbacks. Their experiences can help you by giving you tips on how to avoid the mistakes they made.

Using this approach can help you turn things around at a much faster rate. If you’re not doing this yet, give it some thought.

Drawing from the experiences of others also shows you that you aren’t alone. Many of the most successful people overcame obstacles.

Their stories can help you feel better about your own slip-ups.

In other words, if they did it, so can you. That too is a powerful benefit of using failure to your advantage.

If you’re repeating the same mistakes over and over, it’s time to take a hard look at what you’re doing. If you’re struggling to break that cycle, you may want to find a coach who can help you.

Sometimes, that extra push can be all that you need to get you to break out of the pattern.

JohnK 8-27-2019

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Overheard: “Failure is success if we learn from it”

~Malcolm Forbes

Photo #1 by David Kovalenko on Unsplash

Photo #2 by Woodsy on RGBstockcom

Support Groups: Can They Make a Difference?

August 13, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments

Is a support group right for you? GenuLines looks at some of the factors to consider if you’re leaning in that direction.

Support Groups: Can They Make a Difference?

When you’re dealing with an adverse situation, you may feel like you’re all alone. It seems the bigger the problems, the more alone you feel.

But others have dealt with the same or similar situation themselves. And, they can help you get through it and give you any needed support.

It’s best to face this head-on. Don’t try to put off dealing with it, thinking that it will get better by itself.

Some situations will get better by letting it go, but most won’t.

You should confront the challenge so that it doesn’t build up. You can also make a situation worse than it already is by not taking appropriate actions.

Talk to family members and friends. You may be surprised by their understanding.

And you’ll find some of them may have been in the same situation.

If this falls short, a support group could offer help. The group members may want to meet with you in person to find out more about your circumstances. and how they can help.

Again, don’t put this off because your emotions will build.

Make an appointment as soon as possible. When you find a group that is related to your situation, go to meetings regularly.

It can be either the process or the meetings that help you overcome adversity. Or both.

The groups you find have gone through the process (and may still be going through it). If you try to rush the process, you may not get everything you need from the group.

Many groups offer their help free of charge. However, you should consider pitching in some money as there are costs involved with running these groups.

The groups may ask you to contribute some money to help out. Often, this is voluntary.

But, if the group is worthwhile, you want it to continue as a going concern. They need money for that to happen.

You get out of the group what you put into it, just like anything in life. If you go there and don’t get involved, you shouldn’t expect to get much help from the group.

Become involved and ask a lot of questions.

JK 8-13-2019

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Overheard: “It is a kingly act to assist the fallen” ~Ovid

Appreciate the Small Things And Find Contentment

July 16, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments

You’re intent on finding happiness, but what about contentment? You hear about appreciating the small stuff and feeling happy.

Today GenuLines asks you to turn your aim from happiness to contentment.

Appreciate the Small Things And Find Contentment

Most emotions are transitional, meaning you’re never in one state for long periods. People labeled upbeat actually do have moments of sadness or depression.

And even depressed people may not feel depressed all the time.

Think about a major event such as a war. When two countries are fighting, both sides lose lives.

It’s bloody, and it can last for several years. But, when the war is over, the countries are euphoric.

There will be no more bloodshed because of the war, and people can return to their lives.

But nothing that has changed in the world except that the war has ended. In other words, the sun still sets each day.

People still have to manage their lives.

The euphoria from the war ending doesn’t last long. Months later, the war is still over, but the euphoria has died down.

The same is true in a smaller way when you’re ill. For instance, suppose you have a stomach bug that leaves you uncomfortable and in pain.

When the bug passes you feel wonderful.

Yet, you don’t feel any better than you did when you weren’t experiencing the bug. It’s relative to the bad feelings.

That’s how emotional states work. They go from one to the other on a constant basis.

Appreciating the small things in life may lead to happiness. But, it’s likely you’re content more than you are happy.

Contentment can feel like a neutral state, leaning on the side of happy. There isn’t anything wrong when you’re content.

But, there’s also nothing ratcheting up your happiness.

Consider contentment before happiness

Striving for happiness can be stressful. The antidote? Gratitude. You’ll feel content without having to always push toward happiness.

Time spent in contentment means you’re doing something right.

Think about the people you love. And think about all you have, such as your health and a good job.

Imagine life without them and you’ll really appreciate contentment. That thought may even make you happy, if only for a short time.

JohnK 7-16-2019

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Overheard: “A harvest of peace is produced from a seed of contentment”

~Proverb

Let Your Daily Routine Move You Toward Success

May 28, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments

Spontaneity is a lot more fun than routine. It helps to mix things up and keeps life interesting.

But too much spontaneity can lead to an unstructured way of life. Some people love that, but most find would find that difficult to maintain.

Today GenuLines asks you to take a look at or set up your daily routine.

Setting Your Daily Routine

For starters, enough sleep is important for proper function. If you don’t have a routine, it’s not likely you will get the right amount of sleep every night.

Your body needs to have its internal clock set to the same sleep habits.

What if you don’t have those things in place? You might find it difficult to go to sleep at night.

Or you’ll wake up from time to time during the night.

To help you get to sleep faster, make sure you go to bed at the same time every night and get up at the same time in the morning. Try to avoid drinking too much alcohol as this will disrupt your sleep.

You may fall asleep easier, but you will not go into a deep sleep. That deep sleep interrupts your internal rhythm, and you may not be able to fall back to sleep.

Snoozing over screening

Try to limit the use of electronic devices before you go to bed. Studies tell us devices such as laptops and tablets stimulate your visual senses. This makes it tougher to sleep.

You should have a routine for your diet, too. If you don’t set up the right diet and eat at the same time daily, you will likely have digestion issues.

Your erratic schedule has a downside, too. That’s because your body’s inability to regulate can cause weight gain issues.

An article about routines would be incomplete if it didn’t cover getting exercise. Exercise is also the one element where many people have a problem being consistent.

But a routine here can be a stress-buster. And it can bring better sleep.

You don’t have to incorporate intense exercise. Take a daily or every other day walk.

Then you can check off a big part of your exercise need.

Find the routines that work for you, and work hard to stick with them. Routines are habits, and it takes some effort to develop habits to the point where you don’t even think about them.

There’s room for some spontaneous activity, which everyone needs once-in-a-while. Don’t try to make major changes all at once.

Small changes are best since it’s easier to succeed with them.

JohnK 5-28-2019

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Overheard: “The only routine with me is no routine at all”:

~Jackie Kennedy

Stop Relying Too Much on Others

May 21, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments

If you have difficulty trusting yourself, you may be too dependent on others. The situation can grow and you become dependent on more and more people.

GenuLines knows that can present problems when called upon to handle situations on your own, so read for some helpful ideas.

Stop Relying Too Much on Others

Have you ever let someone else take over a part of your job? You may feel relief when this happens.

But you could be setting yourself up for future failure. The reason this happens is that you didn’t trust that you could do the job yourself.

In the above scenario, you’re taking on something outside of your comfort zone. It may be that your boss wants to test how you will handle a new situation.

He or she gives you an assignment knowing that you have never dealt with it before.

It’s natural to ask others for help when you find yourself in unfamiliar territory. There’s nothing wrong with doing this.

But there’s little growth in letting others solve problems for you. You won’t develop the self-trust for handling new situations.

And your manager will see that you, for the most part, passed the assignment to someone else.

Positivity helps
Face your new challenges with positivity. Be willing to make an attempt even if you make mistakes.

The mistakes are the tools for you to learn. When you do make those mistakes, ask what you did wrong.

Over time, those mistakes will get less and less, and you’ll begin to trust that you can handle the situations.

There’s a subtle result of trying something new. You’ll prove that you can handle new tasks and develop new skills.

That’s enlightening and it’s a big factor in developing trust in yourself.

Every skill you are now good at and find easy you probably struggled with at the start. If you keep this in mind, you will give yourself over to trusting that you can handle anything that comes your way.

You’ll need less reliance on others. But you still should ask questions when you are unsure about something.

That’s another part of learning.

Some people may give you a hard time because it’s inconvenient. But, you’ll find most people want to help you succeed.

It helps them when you get up to speed with new skills.

JohnK 5-21-2019
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Overheard: “Trust but verify”
~Ronald Reagan

Do You Know Your Optimal Routine Zone?

April 23, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments

Do you have a favorite time of day to do your work? Not everyone’s a “rise and shine” thinking dynamo.

Today GenuLines looks at different peak productivity times. Let’s see where you might fit into one of them.

Do You Know Your Optimal Routine Zone?

People have certain times of the day when they do their best work. They get more done and are more focused.

Some do better in the mornings. Others in the afternoons.

Then there are the night owls, who can produce the most during the later hours. These are their optimal routine zones.

What is your optimal routine zone? Are you a morning person or do you cringe at the thought of getting up early?

Do you have vampire blood that lets you do your best work at night?

Match up with the zone

Whatever you find to be your optimal routine zone, set your tasks to work during these times. Do as much of your work as possible during this optimal zone.

Structure your day around it.

Working during your optimal time doesn’t mean you do nothing when you’re outside of those zones. Your boss will likely not take too kindly if you slack off.

Instead, you should use this time for activities that are not as taxing. These include making phone calls and other non-stressful activities.

Sometimes, you’ll have no choice but to do more of the heavy lifting during your “off times.” If this happens, you’ll have to make the best of it.

Zone out

Another problem is that you may be working in a job that does not coincide with your optimal zones. That’s a tough one.

You may want to adjust or to move on to opportunities where you can work during your optimal times.

If your job involves being creative, this concept of optimal zones is going to work in your favor. For instance, if you are a writer, try to do most of your writing during these times.

You can use the other times to answer emails, post on social media, or check out forums related to your writing. If you’re writing for a blog, try writing several posts in your zone.

Schedule them as if you’ve written one per day, etc.

Increasing your productivity is knowing your advantages. Find your optimal work zones and use them effectively.

This way you’ll increase your productivity. Your manager will notice this, and it could help you when asking for a raise or getting a promotion.

It will also give you the satisfaction of a more fulfilling job.

JohnK 4-23-2019

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Overheard: “It’s a hard thing to leave any deeply routine life, even if you hate it.”

~John Steinbeck, East of Eden

Complainers Can Learn to Appreciate Small Things

April 2, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments

Complainers complain. It’s what they do. Are you dealing with such a person? If you are, consider the points in this GenuLines post and apply them to your situation.

Complainers Can Learn to Appreciate Small Things

Do you know a chronic complainer? Someone who never seems to be happy about anything.

They find everything wrong with what others do. If there’s a new idea, they’ll knock it down.

They’re also the type of person who will interrupt others to make their point. They’ll do that because they know best.

But at some point, people start to ignore them. And they’re high on the list if cutbacks should ever hit the company, too.

Complainers have forgotten how to appreciate the small things in life.

They don’t realize that it’s difficult to get a new job and it takes much more time than it used to.

They don’t appreciate that they have a job.

Sometimes, chronic complaining can be a result of complacency. Since no one is listening to what the person says, it’s just easier to complain.

No company or situation is perfect, and sometimes it’s best when problems are out in the open. But there is a time and place for complaints and a correct way to air them.

If you have to complain offer up several solutions to the problem. That’s a productive use of complaining energy.

Call it problem recognition with applicable solutions.

There’s a critical difference between you and a chronic complainer. You appreciate your job or your situation.

Help the complainer

If you want to help a chronic complainer, point out the problem using a subtle approach. Instead of telling the person they complain too much, show them how to be grateful for the little things in life.

Remind them that you feel appreciative of the fact you have a job, etc.

Relate a story- may be about how your last job search was difficult. It took you months, and it made you realize that jobs are not easy to find.

Also, talk about how you appreciate your home life and your family and what it means to you. That’s a subtle approach.

The person may start to understand there is much to appreciate in everyday life. You can show that complaining is ineffective and may lead to problems down the road.

Aim to get friends and colleagues to relate to the same gratitude for work and family.

The chronic complainer may start to see it pays to be appreciative.

JohnK 4-2-2019

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Overheard: “Instead of complaining that the rosebush is full of thorns, be happy that the thorn bush has roses.”

~Proverb

Action Steps For When You Don’t Trust Yourself

March 12, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments

Many people don’t trust themselves for one reason or another. If you include yourself in this group ask yourself why.

Today GenuLines helps you break the issue down and begin to change. Once you discover the problem, you will be well on your way to learning how to trust yourself.

Action Steps For When You Don’t Trust Yourself

Start with your childhood. No, this doesn’t mean you have to spill your guts to a shrink while lying on a couch.

Those early years can give you some clues into why you don’t trust yourself. Could be your parents were distrustful of themselves.

Siblings or other relatives might play a part. The purpose isn’t to blame them.

Recognize that it happened and use it to move forward.

Not trusting others can be habitual. It isn’t too much of a stretch for that mode to extend to you.

Start putting trust in other people and they’ll likely appreciate you for it.

Are you an overly sensitive person? If so, this could cause you to be mistrustful of yourself.

A sensitive nature can cause you to take others’ remarks out of context.

It’s not wrong to be sensitive. You only have to realize that it can cause you to misread what others are saying or feeling.

When trust doesn’t work

Putting your trust in others is going to backfire sometimes. Some people aren’t trustworthy.

They may even put on a front that they are. You should accept this as a part of life, and try not to project experiences from a few onto other people.

Otherwise, you are going to continue to maintain your wall.

This wall will make it difficult for you to trust others as well as yourself.

Another reason for not trusting yourself is that others don’t trust you. If you are not trustworthy, how can you expect to trust yourself?

You may not even realize this is happening.

You may think you are doing right by others when in fact, you aren’t. Ask friends and family to assess whether you’re trustworthy.

That can be a hard pill to swallow, but you’ll get great insight. Try not to get upset if people tell you that you aren’t trustworthy.

It’s a learning experience.

JohnK 3-12-2019

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Overheard: ” Seize the day, and put the least possible trust in tomorrow”

~Horace

Appreciate The Small Things and Find Contentment

February 26, 2019 John Uncategorized No comments

Appreciate the small stuff and you’ll be happy. You hear it enough.

But what is happiness anyway?

Today GenuLines looks at appreciation and its “kissin’ cousin”, contentment.

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Appreciate The Small Things and Find Contentment

Most emotions are transitional, meaning you’re never in one state for long periods. People who are considered upbeat will have moments of sadness or depression.

Even depressed people aren’t depressed all the time. They have moments of happiness, too.

Think about a major event such as a war. When two countries are fighting, both sides lose lives.

It’s bloody, and it can last for years. But, when the war is over, the countries are euphoric.

There will be no more bloodshed because of the war, and people can return to their homes. But, nothing that has changed in the world except that the war has ended.

In other words, the sun still sets each day. People still have to manage their lives.

The euphoria from the war ending doesn’t last long. Months later, the war is still over, but the euphoria has died down.

Same goes for sickness

The same is true in a smaller way when you have a bad sickness. For instance, suppose you have a stomach bug that leaves you uncomfortable and in pain.

When the bug passes you feel fine. But you don’t feel any better than you did when you weren’t experiencing the bug.

It’s relative to the bad feelings. That’s how emotional states work.

They go from one to the other on a constant basis.

Appreciating the small things in life may lead to happiness. But, it’s likely you’re content more than you are happy.

Contentment can almost be thought of as a neutral state, leaning toward the happy side. There’s nothing wrong when you’re content.

But, there also isn’t anything that is making you overly happy.

Striving for happiness can be stressful. You might want to shoot for contentment instead.

Contentment is likely to find you when you appreciate small aspects of your life.

And it comes without the hassle of working hard toward happiness.

If you spend most of your life being content you’re doing something right. Think about all the people you love and what you have, such as your health and a good job, etc.

If you try to imagine life without them, you will truly appreciate your contentment. That thought may even make you happy for a short period.

JohnK 2-26-2019
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Overheard: “My crown is called content, a crown that seldom kings enjoy”
~William Shakespeare

Photo by Belinda Fewings on Unsplash

Ira Israel on CHI FOR YOURSELF And A New “Freebie”

February 13, 2018 John Uncategorized No comments

Last week’s CHI FOR YOURSELF interview with Ira Israel ran into some “technical difficulty” as they say. So it was not available to you live. But my conversation with Ira was recorded.