Chi For Yourself

Much of what’s going on in today’s world requires us to focus on ourselves.

We’re supposed to look out for our best interest. Compete with others for the best job, the biggest car, and the nicest house.

Media messages bombard us with the call to be self-centered and ego-maniacal

When we start to live with purpose, the people around us become more important. Instead of focusing ourselves, we focus on our family, our community, and even the world at large.

That’s quite a bit of a change in perspective and something that will come over time. The cool thing is that the transition is effortless.

You start with purposeful living and end up focusing more on the needs of your loved ones. This could involve paying more attention to your spouse and kids.

From there it moves toward your extended family and your circle of friends.

You notice feelings of happiness as you work with others. Helping them out feels good. Living a purpose driven life that includes other people who are important to us is a great feeling.

From there it fans out. As you get closer to your kids, for example, you get closer to their friends. You also become more empathetic to the needs of other parents and their children.

Your focus starts to shift from you and your immediate family to your local community. Then it moves to the global community. And that’s a very good thing.

Regardless of our teaching and how much we want to believe it, we don’t live in a bubble. We live in a community that stretches across the entire globe.

Our actions, our purchases, and how we choose to live our lives have an impact on everyone else. We can no longer afford and shouldn’t want to live a self-centered life.

You find that community and co-operation give you a much better feeling. It’s yet another advantage to living your life with purpose.

You get to see the world from a different perspective. Not only that, but you’ll also be setting a good example for your children and others around you.

As they see you care about and help others, they become inspired to do the same. That’s pretty powerful stuff.

Your choice to live with purpose can affect hundreds, if not thousands of others and inspire them to do the same.

JohnK 6-23-2017
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Overheard: “Be happy for this moment. This moment is your life.”
                          ~ Omar Khayyam

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Today we look at values. They guide our lives and are like a compass to keep us on the straight and narrow.

You learned basic values as a young child. Those values evolved and you adapted them as you grew into adulthood.

Along the way things got a little murky. You may have questioned the values you learned. Sometimes you outright rejected them. But you didn’t set up a clear new system of values in their place.

Making a purpose driven life your replacement system helps your values become clear. You know for sure what’s most important to you.

You may choose family over a big raise or overtime. You may choose working hard now and saving up over instant gratification. You may choose going out and making friends or exercising (or both at once) over sleeping in on the weekend. You get the idea.

When you live with purpose… no matter how big or small those purposes may be… you live based on values. When you look at it and think about it for a minute, those values will become very clear to you.

You’ll learn what’s most important to you. That in turn will be a big help throughout the rest of your life.

When you get clear and defined values it becomes much easier to make daily decisions and choices. With your value compass in place, you only have to ask yourself if what you are doing is aligning with those values.

That in turn makes your life a lot easier. You no longer have to agonize or second guess yourself. Instead, you make your decision and are confident that it’s the right one.

Having a moral compass and set of values gives you a lot of confidence. You know, without a doubt, that you’re doing the right thing and are moving in the right direction.

Between that and the passion and excitement a purpose driven life brings, you’ll feel like you’re on the right path. That takes a lot of stress, worry, and second guessing out of the equation, which is a very good thing.

You’re calm as you move through life. Making decisions, taking actions, and moving along becomes almost effortless.

I’m sure you’ve noticed people around you who have strong purpose and values. They stride through life instead of stumbling.

That’s our intention. And it’s a major part of this 30 Day Living with Purpose challenge. Start paying attention to your own moral compass and values.

 
 
They’ll serve you well on this sometimes complicated and demanding path called life.

JohnK 6-22-2017
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Are you a worrier by nature? Do you spend your time worrying about anything and everything that could go wrong?

I’ve been there and done that. It’s not the most pleasant or most productive use of your time.

When we worry a lot, it tends to paralyze us. We’re too worried about everything including what’s out of our control and what could go wrong. As a result, we don’t get to the important part of taking action, no matter what the goal or activity was.

The tendency to worry goes way down when we embrace living with purpose. When you know exactly what you want and have the passion for going after it, everything becomes clear.

You know what your first step is and then the next one after that. You get to work and start making progress. You keep going and keep working away to make sure you get done what you’ve set out to do.

In the end, you don’t have time to worry about all that small stuff and that’s a very good thing.

Truth is, most worrying is pointless. It uses up brain space and energy that would be much better spent other places. That doesn’t help you much when you’re busy worrying about anything and everything.

What will help you is shifting your focus, your energy, and your passion. Instead, aim them toward something more productive – your purpose.

When you find your purpose and make it an integral part of your life, you’ll be much too busy to worry. The cure to too much worrying then is taking massive action.

Go and do something that aligns with your purpose. It doesn’t matter what it is. Start with something small that feels safe.

Getting that task under your belt will expose unfounded worries you can push through. It also gives you a sense of accomplishment and that in turn builds confidence.

Confidence is another great weapon against the paralyzing effect of worry. Confident people don’t worry.

With each action you take, you become a little more confident and a little less worried. Build on each success and keep working on your self-confidence.

Keep focusing on why the things you do are important to you and why you embraced a particular purpose.

Focusing on how it is helpful to others is another great tool. This will help you push through and start taking action. That, in turn, builds confidence and decreases worries.

Before you know it, you’ll be too busy to worry. You’ll be taking action toward living a purpose driven life.

JohnK 6-21-2017
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Overheard: The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time. 

                           ~ Mark Twain 

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You stress out. You work too hard. You run around to meet the latest deadline or pay a stack of bills. No wonder you become less than the nicest person to be around.

What if you changed your focus? What if you lived your life with purpose and intention? Living with purpose makes us kinder…and nicer. Why is that?

Living With Purpose Helps You Focus On Others
Living with purpose often includes other people. It’s about those around you as much as about yourself.

We’re social creatures and we like to work with, interact with, and help those around us. When we make those relationships a priority, we take the needs of others into account.

That teaches us empathy and understanding, which in turn makes us nicer and kinder to those around us.

Living With Purpose Takes You Out Of The Competitive Mindset
What if we stopped trying to keep up with everyone around us? Or stopped trying to compete for the highest paying job? Or the biggest car? Or the nicest house?

We would start seeing the signs that life is about much more than outdoing everyone else. Focusing on relationships, experiences, and helping each other out makes us kinder.

The energy we tend to burn on competition gets re-directed.

Living With Purpose Reduces Stress
So now you’re pulling back from the rat race. Instead, you’re embracing meaningful activities and relationships.

You’re becoming happier. And you’ll see that your stress level goes way down.

I don’t know about you, but I’m not the kindest person when I’m stressed out. I find that when I’m more relaxed and fulfilled being kind is a natural state of mind.

Living With Purpose Increases Happiness
It shouldn’t come as a big surprise to you that you’re kinder and nicer to be around when you’re in a good mood. It’s when we’re stressed out, or feeling trapped, mad and angry at the world that we aren’t so much fun to be around.

To recap, living with purpose does quite a few things to make you a kinder, nicer person to be around. If that’s not a great motivator to work towards a more purposeful life, I don’t know what is.

JohnK 6-20-2017
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In our last post, we looked at the effect of living with purpose on your spiritual health. And we saw how it relates to living a happy and fulfilled life.

Today we’ll switch gears and talk about things that don’t make you happy.

What doesn’t make you happy is money and more material possessions. In fact, quite the opposite seems to be true.

Now at times a bit of extra cash or more reliable car can decrease your stress and worries. And that does bring a measure of happiness.

But once we have our needs and simple comforts met, something interesting happens.

From there on out, more money and more possessions give us more “stuff” to worry about.

The goal then shouldn’t be to do everything we can to keep up with the Joneses. Instead, what makes us happy is living a purpose driven and meaningful life.

Deep down you already know this. Meaningful experiences trump material gifts anytime.

We remember the fun trips we took as kids. And the great times we had at concerts. A pile of presents under the tree pales in comparison.

There are exceptions. Like the year you got the new bike. But that gift had purpose and meaning behind it.

So boosting happiness and well-being through more money and stuff is not the answer.

Better to first cover the basic needs. Then shift your focus to experiences and relationships. That’s the key to leading a happy and fulfilled life.

Also important is focusing on finding purpose in what we do.

Financial goals are fine. But don’t leave out goals for your relationships and experiences.

Your thoughts might drift toward your next promotion. Or how you’ll afford a new car. But make sure you send your primary thought time and energy to the most important people and things.

Start living with purpose and making a difference. You’ll increase the well-being of people around you.

And you’ll be happier, too.

JohnK 6-19-2017
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Overheard: “God gave us the gift of life; it is up to us to give ourselves the gift of living well.”                      

                       – Voltaire

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Today we look at spiritual health or wellness and the affect living with purpose has on it. Makes no difference which spirituality or religion you follow.

We live in a very diverse society and as a result, some folks will have different beliefs than others. Even within faiths, there are vast differences in beliefs.

In the end, living with purpose and intention has shown to be beneficial, no matter what your belief.

Having a purpose is a primal human need. We want to feel needed and we need to know that we’re making a difference.

This leaves us feeling fulfilled, happy, and complete. That’s why living with purpose is so important and why it is good for your spiritual health.

The Need To Be Needed
We enjoy it when others need us. We’re prone to sadness and loneliness when we can’t help those around us and make a difference in their lives.

Having a purpose and living with purpose allows us to do that on a regular basis. It fulfills the need to be needed.

The Need To Find Meaning In Life
Another common human desire or need is to find meaning in life. We don’t like to feel like we’re wasting our time here.

Living with purpose gives meaning to each day. That, in turn, makes us feel happier and more fulfilled.

The Need To Have Hope
At the end of the day, even when things seem bad, we need to have hope. Having a purpose means we have a plan and we have something to strive towards.

That’s hope in action.

It is hope that we’ll make a difference. It’s hope that things we’ll make our situation better. And it is hope that we can get ourselves out of the hole we may find ourselves in.

The Need For Values
We also need sound values to live a happy and fulfilled life. Our values are like a compass that guides us along the way.

If you’re a parent, you know how important it is to impart strong values on your children. Without them, they feel lost and insecure.

That can add a lot of stress and unhappiness.

We’re no different as adults. Living our life with purpose by default provides us with a strong set of values to live by.

Living with purpose is good for the mind and spirit. It allows you to live a more fulfilling and happier life and make a difference in the world.

JohnK 6-18-2017
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When you start thinking about and then living with purpose something wonderful happens.

You start taking action.

You start doing things instead of second guessing yourself and procrastinating. You get off the couch and get going on the things you’ve always wanted to do.
 
 
Taking action becomes so much easier when you have a clear purpose. You have an outcome in mind and you know exactly what the next step is that you need to take.

What’s more important, you have big motivation to get it done.

Let’s look at weight loss as an example. You can try to lose some weight and get into shape for months and even years with little success.

Sure, you eat a little better. And you go for a walk every now and then. But because you don’t have an actual purpose, you don’t get far.

Now and then you’ll give in to the urge to snack, get a second helping, or indulge in a cookie. There’s no big reason to get serious about losing weight and there’s no deadline.

Now let’s pretend for a moment. You’re getting married in nine months and you’ve got to look fantastic on your big day.

You have a dress or suit size in mind and a pretty good idea of how many pounds you have to lose by your wedding day. Bingo! You have a purpose, a goal, and a deadline.
 
 

That’s exactly what it takes to get serious about losing weight.

You start taking massive action. You clean up your diet, cut out the sugar and processed food.

You start working out to tone and reshape your body as you start to drop those pounds. You read up on and learn as much as you can about nutrition and the latest trends in diet and exercise.

The result? You start shedding the pounds. And you’re looking better and better the closer you get to your non-negotiable deadline.
 

That’s the power of putting a purpose into action. It spurs you on and motivates you to do things and make changes.

Having a purpose also keeps you from procrastinating out of a false fear of failure. Does that mean you won’t fail? Of course not.

You may not hit your weight loss goal. And you may cheat and have a doughnut along the way. That’s not the point.                                                                                         

Even with the occasional stumble, your purpose keeps fueling your progress. You pick yourself up and get right back to it.

Purpose is motivating you.

Not taking action because you think you may fail is no longer an option.

And that’s a pretty big deal.  

JohnK 6-17-2017

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Overheard: “If you love life, don’t waste time, for time is what life is made up of”

                            ~ Bruce Lee 

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