Tag Archive for find your happiness

Self-Sabotaging Thoughts That Hinder Happiness

It’s been said that thoughts are things. And things aren’t so good when your thoughts turn against you. 

We go deeper as GenuLines takes a closer look at this thoughts thing.  

Self-Sabotaging Thoughts That Hinder Happiness

At times you’ll struggle to get your thoughts to align with your intentions. These types of thoughts focus on what’s wrong.
 
Or on what’s missing. Or on the negativity of the situation instead of the positives.
 
a picture of thoughts

 

I Don’t Like People

Introverts can have a problem with this. They tend to base their decisions on how many people will be around to see the results..
 
They tend to make decisions that are not good for them because they are not comfortable being who they are. Turn that thought around.
 
Take action.
 
But focus on how you can give yourself care during anxious moments around people. It’s okay to be who you are.

I Am Too ____

Anytime you start a thought with, I am “too” you get into trouble. People often worry about things that no one else ever thinks about.
 
Yet sometimes they might worry about things that other people do think about.
 
For example, you find yourself saying you’re too fat, too dumb, too something. Turn that around by setting up steps that will get you to your goals.

I’ll Do That When I ______

You may have said it before to yourself. “I’ll do that when I go back to school.”
 
“I’ll do that when I clean the house.” “I’ll do that when I lose weight.”
 
You know the drill. Unless you need to do the thing in the blank, don’t allow that to get in your way.
 
If you do need to do it, make a step-by-step plan to get it done.

I Can’t Do _____

You may have heard your child, or yourself, or someone else say “I can’t do math.” Or “I can’t cook.”
 
The truth is, no one can do any of that without learning how to do it.
 
No one pops out of the womb knowing how to cook, write, read, or do math. Anyone can learn whatever they want to learn given the time and effort to do it.

Saying I Should ____

Have you ever heard that it’s important not to “should” all over everyone? Not only is it a bad idea to create “shoulds” for others, it’s a terrible idea to create them for yourself.

In the Past ___

You dwell on the past and what someone did to you then. Or you fixated on what things were like in the past.
 
This thinking isn’t going to help you overcome self-sabotage. While it’s okay to use the past as a learning example, it’s not okay to use it as an excuse not to move forward.
 
Remember you’re only in charge of yourself.

In the Future ____

You don’t want to focus on the past but you also don’t want to be too focused on what’s ahead. Focus on today and tomorrow will take care of itself.

If I Was More Like Them –

Never compare yourself to someone else in a negative way. It’s okay to look at what someone has accomplished.
 
Learn how to do it yourself, and follow their footsteps.
 
But don’t wish yourself away. Only you can be you.
 
Whenever you find you’re focused on a negative aspect of any situation, try to turn your mind around. Focus on the positives.
 
Yes, sometimes you’re going to have a sad or negative thought, that’s normal. It’s not about the ups and downs of life.
 
Those are natural. It’s about how you comport yourself the rest of the time.
 
That’s the better path to happiness.
 
JohnK 3-20-2023
 
stick man hears about thoughtsOverheard: “A man is literally what he thinks, his character being the complete sum of all his thoughts.”
                          ~James Allen, As a Man Thinketh
 
 
 
Articlle image by Miguel Á. Padriñán: https://www.pexels.com/photo/white-bubble-illustration-1111372/
 
 
 
disclaimer for thoughts
 

How Meditation Can Benefit Your Motivation

 
Meditation might not be your first thought when your motivation is on the wane. But GenuLines knows that it can be a go-to tool for those times when you lose your spark, 
 
How Meditation Can Benefit Your Motivation

meditation momentThe downward spiral of low motivation can seem like an impossible cycle to break. During those times productivity and accomplishment can seem like unattainable goals. 

 
 
 
 
There is one simple tool you may not have considered before that can get you back on track, and that’s meditation. It’s an exercise that goes well beyond providing relaxation.

Focus and Concentration

Focus and concentration are by-products of meditation. But don’t force the issue.
 
This could have a negative effect on your motivation.

Increased Happiness

More and more of us are being diagnosed with depression. It’s no surprise that happy people tend to have more energy and higher self-confidence.
 
And motivation raises happiness by helping release the brain’s “happiness hormones.” When you’re feeling more positive, you’re likely to have more desire to get things done.

Less Stress

Meditation leads to a more relaxed state. This is due to the way it allows the brain to slow down as it receives sensory input.
 
This relaxation and improved processing leads to reduced feelings of stress and overwhelm. With less stress comes a feeling of more control, which then fuels your motivation.

Positive Thinking

One of the biggest killers of motivation is negative thinking. A pessimistic view can come from many sources.
 
Think depression, poor habits, or general life difficulties.
 
The beauty of meditation is that it “rewires” brain patterns. This process encourages more positive thought patterns.
 
The result is a reset that helps you become more motivated.

Clarified Goals and Purpose

Taking time each day for meditation can give you a great deal of insight. This helps with reassessing what’s most important in your life.
 
When you have a better picture of your priorities, your goals and life’s purpose become clearer. Knowing where you want to go kicks your motivation into high gear.
 
And you’ll feel a greater urgency to take the necessary steps on the path to your dreams.
The benefits of meditation for increased motivation are many. There are various types of meditation.
 
You can begin to research on your own or find a teacher who can help you develop a practice that works for you. What’s most important is that you get started.
 
And maintain consistency in your meditation practice to get the most effective results. Soon you’ll be tackling your to-do list and pursuing the life goals that matter with renewed vigor.
 
JohnK 11-16-2020
 
stick figure man hears about meditationOverheard: “When you own your breath, nobody can steal your peace”
                                               ~Unknown
 
 
 
 
 
disclaimer for meditation

Happiness Doesn’t Run On Success

 

Happiness runs on a diet of success. That seems to make sense.

But GenuLines asks you to consider a different path to happiness.

Banner helps with happiess

Happiness Doesn’t Run On Success

It’s easy to simplify happiness and say that it’s obvious that successful people are happy. But if you interviewed 100 successful people you might find otherwise.
 
directions to happiness
 
You can have wealth, great spouse and kids, and yet not be happy.
 
Turn the equation around and you find that happiness fuels success.
 
 
 
 
 
The Effect on Productivity
When people are happy with their work, they approach it more with a more cheerful attitude (some say they’d do it for nothing) When you have good health, food, and shelter you can find joy doing the most mundane things.
 
You focus on outcomes instead of effort.
 
The Bottom Line
Certain companies offer living wages, benefits, and flexible schedules. This can result in higher profits for the employer.
 
When people feel respected they’re likely happier about work, even when it’s hard.
 
Stability
When people are happy, they tend to be a lot more stable. They stick to tasks longer, and are more likely to complete an assignment.
 
They tend to job hop a lot less, too. This is one reason smart employers know that by making work a happy place they can reduce turnover.
 
A Better Work Ethic
People often think of work ethic as something that grows out of adversity. Happy people tend to stick to their jobs longer and work even harder.
 
They put their positive energy into envisioning the outcomes.
 
Don’t Bet on Wealth
An unhappy wealthy person may even be hateful. They seem to have everything but happiness.
 
Bank balances look good but don’t always make you feel good.
 
A New Attitude
It may surprise you but happiness can color your view of the world. You’ll see brighter outcomes regardless of your situation.
 
Staying In The Now
If you’re happy today you’re more likely to eat right, move more, get your work done, and do everything well. Of course, that can affect the future too.
 
Mindset
Still, doubt that happiness comes from your mindset? With some effort, you can train yourself to have a happier and more positive mindset.
 
This can work during tough times, too.
 
You can realize happiness now regardless of your life situation.
Accept that possibility while at the same time planning to make changes.
 
JohnK 12-27-2019
 
stick figure talking about happinessOverheard:  “People don’t notice whether it’s winter or summer when they’re
happy”              
                                      ~Anton Chekhov
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
disclaimer about happiness

Is True Happiness Possible?

Happiness has a reputation for being elusive. Some would say it’s not even possible.

GenuLines offers you some points to consider as you do your own evaluation. 

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Is True Happiness Possible?

When your struggles get to be too much it’s easy to think that happiness is not even possible. The truth is there are different levels of happiness that you can experience in your life.
 
The process doesn’t move in a straight line. Your attitude is the difference maker.
 
Look Around You
happy personIt’s one thing to say that people can’t be happy unless they have their basic needs met. But there are people all around you who don’t have their needs met yet are very happy.
 
 
 
Studies of affluent people tend to show find they’re not happier than poor people in general.
 
It’s Not About Stuff
If you look at a list of the happiest countries in the world, you tend to find that being happy isn’t about owning things. Often the happiest people live in the poorest countries.
 
It’s common to find that the USA ranks in the teens on these lists. Stuff doesn’t guarantee happiness.
 
It’s Not Even About Goals
You may insist that it’s all about about reaching your goals. If you often say things like “I’ll be happy when…” then happiness may elude you.
 
You can be happy now, before you reach your goals.
 
It’s Not About Your Circumstances
Now, of course, some things in life can really get you down. But a happy disposition can serve you well.
 
You’ll be better able to navigate the murky water.
 
*Dr. Gillian Mandich is a well known name in this area. She believes that our circumstances account for only 10 percent of our happiness.
 
Happiness is about accepting that you can experience it and understanding it’s meaning. A happy person isn’t going to be the same level of happy 24/7, 365 days a year.
 
Think about cancer sufferers who manage to have a happy attitude. Or children around the world who don’t get enough to eat.
 
Be in that state of mind and you can be happy, too.
 
JohnK 12-26-2019
 
stick figure talking about happinessOverheard: “It’s a helluva start, being able to recognize what makes you happy.”
                                             ~Lucille Ball
 
 
 
 
 
 
disclaimer about happiness

Happiness Is More Than Thinking Positive Thoughts

 
Your happiness level isn’t what you’d like it to be. Someone in your circle suggests that you should think positive thoughts. That’s the answer, or so it seems. 
 
Today GenuLines looks at happiness as more than just staying in a positive mindset.  

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Happiness Is More Than Thinking Positive Thoughts

The dictionary defines happiness as “the state of being happy.” Not a lot of information to go on there.
 
Let’s look at some different things that happiness can be. But realize that in truth, happiness is in the mind of the beholder.
 
smiley faces show happiness
 
Your Needs are Met
When a person is happy, they usually aren’t wanting for much. It doesn’t mean that they’re not having a tough time.
 
Rather, they’re making what they have fill their needs.
You feel satisfied
When you’re happy you tend to feel satisfied with your life. You think about your life and feel good about your good fortune.
 
This could include your living space, your life partner, or the fact that you live alone.
 
Contentment is a hallmark of happy people. Whether it’s their job, home, health, or things in general.
 
Happy people do experience stress. But they have a way of drawing on their contentment when things are less than perfect.
 
You Are at Peace
A happy person often feels a lot of peace surrounding their life and family. They tend to know that everything will turn out okay.
 
They’re pretty good at turning negativity into positivity.
 
Your Definition
You can set your own definition of happiness. It’s not necessarily about getting tons of stuff.
 
It’s not about finding a spouse unless you want that. Or about having kids, unless you want that.
 
It’s a Journey
Happiness isn’t a destination where you’ll forever dwell. It’s a lifelong journey that will have many ups and downs and struggles.
 
Still, you manage to feel good about it.
 
In the 1989 movie “Parenthood”, one of the main characters is a struggling mother. She says she loves “the roller-coaster” of life.
 
Her husband, though, is struggling and not as happy. He focuses on the downs instead of the ups.
 
It’s How You Act
When you’re happy your actions lean toward the positive. You eat better, you move more, you think better thoughts.
 
Know that you have it in your power to be happy where you are in your life right now.
 
Thinking positive thoughts is not the be-all and end-all of happiness. It’s having your needs met, yes.
 
But it’s not about having everything, or even the best. It’s about being satisfied with what you have while also being able to work toward the things you want.
 
It starts with your thoughts. And it manifests with your actions.
 
JohnK 12-24-2019
 
stick figure talking about happinessOverheard: “If thou wilt make a man happy, add not unto his riches but take away from his desires.”
                                                         ~Epicurus
 
 

 

 

Article Image by Gino Crescoli from Pixabay  
 
 
disclaimer about happiness
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Does Your Life Hold Meaning?

picture of john kobikWe’re moving right along in the CHI FOR YOURSELF series on finding your “why.” Time to take notice of feelings that are surfacing. Maybe you’re a little down and thinking that your life doesn’t have much meaning. If so, this installment is intended to give you the courage to keep move through the feelings.

 

Does Your Life Hold Meaning?                                                          

 

Can you honestly say that your life holds meaning for you? If you are not sure, then do you know how to identify your true calling in life? Once you do the next step is to have the strength to follow it.

Many people sit and feel quite depressed about not knowing what they should be doing with their life. This happens early in life. Do you remember being in high school and having to choose a career for the rest of your life? Talk about feeling pressured at a young age.

Everyone has some type of true calling or purpose in life, and yes life does have a meaning. Sometimes your true calling is staring you in the face, you just don’t recognize it yet.

Your true calling can be identified in various ways. Many people believe that God will show them the way to their true calling. Others experience dreams that open up their eyes to a new opportunity.

You have no doubt heard stories about people experiencing death and then coming back to life. When they recover they find they have a new outlook on life altogether.

Now, you don’t have to wait for something terrible to happen to you! Instead, you can start discovering your true calling and the meaning of life yourself.

question mark

Sit down and think about what it is that you would love to do with your life. Think about what you would do if money was no objection and you didn’t have to worry about anyone but yourself.

Write down all the things that come to mind. If you have several put them in order of priority. Which is the one item that you truly feel passionate about? Then ask yourself– if you were to do this would you feel as though your life had meaning?

When you can truly answer these questions openly and honestly you will be well on your way to uncovering what the meaning of life has for you. Remember we are all different and no two people will see something in the same way.
Your next step is to be courageous and follow your passion. You may be surprised at the opportunities that open up for you. There is no reason for anyone to be sitting and feeling unfulfilled, or thinking that their life has no purpose. It does, you just have to find yours.

Listen to this article by clicking on the following player:

 

 

JohnK 10-3-2016

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stick figure of manOverheard: “Everyone now knows how to find the meaning of life within himself.”
~ Kurt Vonnegut, The Sirens of Titan

 

Can Anger Identify Your Passion?

picture of john kobikLIfe seems to provide an endless supply of things that make us angry, bugged, hassled, or ticked-off! Yet if we examine those feelings they can take us a long way toward finding our fulfillment. This next installment in the CHI FOR YOURSELF series on finding your “why” is offered to you as another tool for self-discovery.

 

Can  Anger  Identify  Your  Passion?                                                          

 

If you have read any type of self-development or improvement information, you know you are told to find those things that make you feel happy. Everyone should have a passion in life, as this helps you add meaning to your life. But just how do you find it?

One way to identify your passion is to look at those things that make you angry. You know, those times when you fly off the handle without even thinking about it. This could be when you see an animal being mistreated or hear about a child being abused.

Still not sure what your passion is? Then take a look around you and make note of all the things that make you upset. Anything that stirs some type of emotion in you; tears, anger, or frustration.

It can be helpful to write these things down, especially if you have more than one thing that bothers you. Once you have your list select the main one that troubles you the most. This would be the one thing that you would happily fix if you could.

The more personal this becomes the more passionate you will be. If you have seen one of your pets abused first hand, this would resonate with you on a much deeper level.
angry man

When you get angry your feelings can often overwhelm you. You have no real control over them and they flare up unexpectedly. What this signifies is that you are dealing with something you are passionate about. Your goal is to now take this energy and turn it into a passion instead of feeling angry.

When identifying your passion you need to pick that one thing that you can identify with. You don’t want to bend to the rules of society and be passionate about something just to be part of a group.

Finding your passion often entails getting out of your comfort zone. It is way too easy to like something just because a friend does. It is much harder to stick up for yourself and stay passionate to your true feelings.

By being true to your own feelings, you are fulfilling your life. You are doing something meaningful and making a difference. Not everyone is going to approve of what your passion is. You need to have the confidence to stay on track, if and when friends try to tell you otherwise. This way you will know you are being true to yourself and to your passion.

You can listen to this article by clicking on the player:

 

Be well!

John in cursive

 

 

 

JohnK9-26-2016

chiforyourself.com home

 

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Overheard:

“The greatest remedy for anger is delay.”
~ Lucius Annaeus Seneca

 

 

Are You Stuck Finding Your Why?

picture of john kobikThe CHI FOR YOURSELF series on finding your why is moving right along. But as we reach the mid-way point you may be feeling as though you’ve hit a wall. This process is simple but not always easy. The following tips (I think of them as bullet points) are intended to give more clarity to your journey.

 

Are  You  Stuck  on  Finding  Your  Why?                                                                          

Anyone who has taken any type of self-improvement course has been told to find their why. While this may sound easy enough, it is not always simple to identify your why. This article will give you some suggestions for how you can really find your why in life.

Before you can identify your why you need to know which area of your life needs improvement. Why are you looking for a meaning to your life? Are you looking for an overall purpose, or do you need to develop a why for a specific reason? For example, you may want to uncover your why so you can lose weight or stick to an exercise regimen.

It can often be a little easier to define your why for specific reasons. If you are trying to lose weight you will want to have certain reasons for doing so. This could include wanting to look more attractive, to feel better, to be able to play with your kids or to battle a medical issue.

To uncover your why it can be helpful to understand why you are doing your current habits. With eating, as an example, why is it that you are over eating? Are you self-conscious about a certain part of your body? Are you addicted to sugar or to carbs?

Once you have this information in hand it can be easier to develop a why. If you want to kick the sugar habit start paying attention to those times when you eat more sugar.  Are you feeling unhappy or alone when you do this?

Uncovering your why can be difficult and it does require that you are open and honest with yourself. But once you have a why then you can be more focused and motivated.

If you want to find your why to living a more fulfilled and happier life in general,  you have to do almost the same steps.  First, you need to identify what it is that is making you feel unhappy. Are you lonely, do you hate your job, or do you wish you were in a better relationship?

Once you know why you feel the way you do, it will be easier to take corrective steps. If you are feeling lonely, can you join a health or social club? If you are just plain bored, is there a hobby that you would like to start?

Even if you are currently stuck on finding your why use the above steps to uncover your true feelings. This, in return, will identify your why.

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JohnK 9-19-2016

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Overheard:

“Very little is needed to make a happy life; it is all within yourself, in your way of thinking.”

~ Marcus Aurelius

Finding Your Why

picture of john kobikThe CHI FOR YOURSELF series on finding your purpose in life continues with this installment called “Finding Your Why.”

 

Finding  Your  Why

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Do you have a why in your life? A reason that keeps you motivated and helps you to get out of bed each morning? If you don’t you may often feel as though you are just plodding along the path of life. All you do is go through the motions of living without having anything to look forward to.

woman searching

If you don’t have a why in your life then it is definitely time to discover what yours is. Most likely you have a dream or a goal that you would love to pursue, but for some reason, you don’t.

For anyone who is attempting to achieve something or reach a goal, it is much easier to do so if you have a reason for it. This way of thinking is often associated with people who are trying to lose weight. Nothing seems to work for them until they uncover the true reason for why they want to lose weight.

Your why can be quite simple and it could be doing certain things in order to become healthier. Or maybe you why is to start an online business so you can retire with your partner from your jobs.

Your why is often associated with your health, family, and financial goals. After all without money you can’t pay the bills or buy food to feed your family.

One thing to bear in mind, as well, is that your why can change as you grow. As your life changes so do the things you need, this can give you a different purpose in life.

A younger person may have a why of saving for a new home or getting a University degree. As you age your why may change to include exercising more so you can enjoy your grandchildren.

Many people will turn to religion in order to uncover their why. No two people will ever share the same why. You may have the same goal as someone else. But you will both have different reasons for attaining them.

The best way to discover your why is to be honest with yourself. This requires letting all your skeletons out of your closet. Sit down in a quiet place and truly think about what it is you want out of life.

This is not always an easy process even when you do know your why. You may not know how to achieve it at first. Just remember to keep an open mind and start working in a small way each day to achieve your why.

(You can listen to this article by clicking on the player below)

 

 

JohnK 9-12-2016

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Overheard:

“He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.”
~ Friedrich Nietzsche

Your Dreams Then and Now: What They May be Saying to You

picture of john kobikFinding your why. That’s our intention in this continuing  CHI FOR YOURSELF series. In today’s installment, we look at your childhood dreams and what they may be telling you all these years later. Keep dreaming!

 

Your  Childhood  Dreams

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Do you remember the dreams that you had in your childhood? The ones that centered around what you would like to do when you grew up. Did you ever follow those dreams or have they been pushed into the depths of your mind?

If you are feeling as though your life is missing something then you may want to take a look at the dreams you had as a child. If you still carry them with you, chances are they are things that you are passionate about.

Think back and let your childhood memories surface. Back then did you want to fly a plane, be a fireman or doctor, or travel to the other side of the world? Did you want to play in a band or write poetry all day?

picture of word dream

 

Just a dream

Of course, some of your childhood dreams may not have been practical. Especially those based around space travel or adventures on the high seas!

Once you have uncovered your dreams, are there any that now seem more reachable? If so, then why not attempt to make one of them come true?

If you wanted to be a singer, act in a play or write a novel, why not start now and do those things? You really are never too old to try something new, and it’s never too late to take up a new hobby.

What are your current talents and gifts? Can you combine one of your talents with a dream? Maybe as a child, you wanted to travel the world on a ship. Why not write a novel based on this?

Maybe you have a talent for art and graphics. Can you combine this with an old dream? You could look into ways of helping young children become graphic artists. Or use your talents to support a local charity or cause.

Just because you have matured, it doesn’t mean that you can’t have dreams and desires anymore. Take your life experiences and mix them with your desires and create a new passion or interest in your life.

It actually takes risks and courage to follow a dream at any age. Are you prepared to finally make one of your childhood dreams come true? If you don’t take a chance on yourself, you are missing out on fulfilling your life. Remember that no one else is going to do it for you!

JohnK 9-5-2015

chiforyourself.com home

Listen to the article by clicking on this player…

 

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Overheard:

All our dreams can come true – if we have the courage to pursue them. –                                     Walt Disney