Tag Archive for sadness

Wallowing Over Google Gremlins :-( And a Link to The Tina Gilbertson Interview


Picture of Tina GilbertsonApologies for problems on the Google Hangouts page that muted the audio for the Tina Gilbertson interview! Tina is the author of Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings by Letting Yourself Have Them. Tina turned conventional wisdom around with her explanation of how “constructive wallowing” can help in dealing with feelings. A list of talking points follows, and you can hear the interview by clicking on the BlogTalkRadio logo.


CHI FOR YOURSELF guest: Tina Gilbertson talking points:

  • Isn’t wallowing an oxymoron?
  • Having a good cry might not be enough
  • Self-criticism is not healing
  • Anger, temper, and wallowing
  • The T.R.U.T.H. Technique
  • Hatred, and working through it
  • Self-compassion toward yourself
  • Trying to replace a feeling with a thought
  • The benefits of constructive wallowing
  • Forgiveness- the policy and the emotion
  • The wallowing end-point


You can hear the CHI FOR YOURSELF interview with Tina Gilbertson by clicking on the BlogTalkRadio logo:



JohnK 9-12-2014

chiforyourself.com home

Today: Wallowing is Good For You!


Child hiding faceToday’s guest on Chi For Yourself is Tina Gilbertson. She says pushing bad feelings away never works, and she’ll offer us a practical approach to the more liberating alternative of allowing yourself to feel them. Chi For Yourself – at 4pm Eastern, 1pm Pacific time. Hear the interview at chiforyourself.com




Dividing line


Tina Gilbertson is the author of Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings by Letting Yourself Have Them.

Picture of Tina Gilbertson

Tina Gilbertson


listener animation



“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love an affection”

~ Gautama Buddha




JohnK 9-11-2014

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Happy Ways Are Here Again: Happiness as a Matter of Choice

Be with us for today’s Chi For Yourself and guest Daniel Parmeggiani. Daniel is the author of The Magnificent Truths of Our Existence: Unlocking the Deeper Reality of Permanent Happiness.

Picture of Daniel Parmeggiani

Daniel Parmeggiani

The interview can be heard live at 1pm Pacific time at www.chiforyourself.com





” Thousands of candles can be lit from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared”




Article: The Simplicity of Choosing Happiness
In our new age of spirituality, where east meets west in the modern labyrinth of mental and spiritual healing, two clear definitions to happiness remain; (1) that happiness is a value synonymous with well-being and thriving, and (2) as opposed to depression, it is something we as humans seek. In essence happiness itself remaining the primary goal – and more elusive.

Psychological research suggests that each individual has what is called a ‘Happiness Set-point’ (HSP) determining overall well-being; happier when things balance our inner HSP and quite unhappy (even miserable), when things go against us, or fall short of it. We alone draw that line and in so doing compound our intrinsic belief, that sentience has a right to happiness, no matter what. Even an animal (and our basic survival instincts) will seek comfort against pain, to find it.

Evidence from research shows that 40% of our happiness is within our control and a voluntary choice we make. Psychologist William James, adds that it is our attitude that hinders or helps us reach our HSP. It seems that it is a natural human reflex to alter our attitude to achieve it. We want to maintain our HSP at all costs. Ironically, the indifference of the depressed, is a matter of ongoing research on lower HSP levels as per socio-economic standards, environmental and chemical imbalance.

Biblical and Buddhist philosophy maintain that all happiness comes from seeking it, yet ironically, a principle point of Buddhism is that all striving is suffering. This would explain why realistic goals are paramount, as true happiness may only be achieved through the balance of effort and suffering, and not the eternal ‘good-time’ that modern pop-psychology would have us believe. Being happier takes effort, especially if it’s a choice we make and maintain with mindfulness. Without effort, one can argue that happiness is hollow and not happiness at all.
Transformation might well be as simple as ‘Seek and ye shall find’ and no matter your labour to your HSP (health, diet, supplements; yoga and exercise; meditation, gratitude, education, journals, self-help, new-age, and/or new-thought mindfulness); the bottom line is that you are still only partaking in the most natural human birth-right of our species. Best to keep it simple.


JohnK 5-29-2014

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